Posted by Daniel Frank at 6:03 PM

Why does the spell-check feature of Blogger not include "blogging" and "blog"?
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Posted by Daniel Frank at 6:01 PM

I apologize for the sparse blogging. I purchased an automobile (a 2001 Toyota Prius) off my brother. The problem is the car's in Washington DC and I live in Los Angeles. So I'm driving the car cross-country with a stop in Houston for a couple of days to do Thanksgiving with the folks.

The first issue was selling the old car. I was unsure how exactly I would do that. Fortunately, Lincoln Boulevard, a street near where I live, is apparently the "$$$$$ CA$H FOR YOUR CAR!!!!! $$$$$" capitol of Los Angeles, if not the world.

Some observations on the road (DISCLAIMER:Working under the "making good time" theory of cross-country driving, I did not actually visit any wacky locations I might list but I do have the pamphlets):

1. About every three miles on a Mississippi highway, there is a sign that says "DO NOT DRIVE ON THE MEDIAN". A less charitable man than myself would suggest that Mississippians are such dopes that there would be an epidemic of median driving if not for the signs. I suspect that a seven-year-old child got hit by a car while playing on the median. And so Timmy's Law was passed which constructed these signs.
2. Under the "nature abhors a vacuum" category, White Castle had not expanded to the Southeast and so the market demand there for tiny, square hamburgers remained unmet. And lo, Krystal was born! The fact that I saw one every other highway stop in Tennessee indicates that White Castle could have made a fortune there.
3. What impressed me about the pamphlet for Trinity Music City USA was that the pamphlet featured a picture of Jesus wearing a proper tallis.
4. Had it not been late at night when I obtained its pamphlet from the Tennessee Welcoming Center, I perhaps would have visited the Museum of Salt and Pepper Shakers.
5. From now on when I start to curse the fates for my marginal show-biz career, I can thank the stars that I've not been desperate enough to send my resume to the Comedy Barn. I am happy that my tastes are not so far off the mainstream; I say this because the two things that caught my attention in the pamphlet, a guy holding a pig and a guy in a dress, are prominently featured in the top of the frame of the site. A good lesson students of comedy should learn is that the Comedy Barn didn't get greedy and have the guy in the dress hold the pig; that would have been too much.
6. The Comedy Barn's site does not provide a straight answer of who exactly awarded it "Winner Funniest Show 5 Years in a Row". The pamphlet says it won the award for six years in a row. Why is the pamphlet more up-to-date than the website?
7. The stand-up comics reading this blog will be amused to learn that Comedy Barn cast-member Eric Lambert "has appeared on Showtime and Evening at the Improv."
8. Meet Chester Fried, the cowboy chicken mascot of the Chester Fried chicken chain. The sheriff star indicates that Chester is some sort of chicken Quisling, rounding up the other chickens in exchange for his cowardly life.
And speaking of anthropomorphic restaurant mascots, Barney Barnhill represents the good folks of Barnhill's. Presumably the various delicious food comes from animals that live in him.

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Posted by Daniel Frank at 3:11 PM

An interesting turn of events: The DVD's of Family Guy are so popular that Fox may make more episodes. Article here.
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Posted by Daniel Frank at 4:13 PM

This Tuesday, the X2:X-Men United DVD launch party includes a "X-treme Mutant" costume contest (Details here). When the original X-Men movie came out, a couple of friends and I were joking about going dressed in costumes. I proposed going as the Sub-Mariner. If anyone in line to see the movie said that Namor was not a member of the X-Men, I would point out that he is Marvel's First Mutant.
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Posted by Daniel Frank at 4:07 PM

The Hebrew Hammer, a blaxploitation parody but with Jews, is opening on December 19th. When I first heard of this movie two years ago, it was supposed to be a Ben Stiller-Chris Rock vehicle. Apparently they had other commitments.

This reminds me of a game called "ask for/settle for/get"; for example, the makers of this movie asked for Ben Stiller and Chris Rock, would have settled for David Schwimmer and Bernie Mac, and got Adam Goldberg and Mario Van Peebles.

I'm seeing it anyhoo; just saying is all.

UPDATE: A friend asks if they got Mario Van Peebles because Garret Morris was booked.
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Posted by Daniel Frank at 3:52 PM

My brother corrected my description of Leo Frank as the only Jew lynched in America, noting Andrew Goodman and Michael Schwermer, two of the three civil rights workers murdered in Mississippi in June 1964 (more info here) as well as Yankel Rosenbaum, the Jewish Reginald Denny.
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Posted by Daniel Frank at 2:40 PM

Real-life attempts to create tomacco and Skittlebrau.
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Posted by Daniel Frank at 9:30 AM

From the "Bless the Internet" Department: I was watching on the TV "High Diving Hare", the Looney Tune where Yosemite Sam tries to force Bugs Bunny to do a deadly high dive and is constantly tricked into doing it himself. At one point, Bugs has constructed a door on the diving board. Sam bangs on the door screaming "Open the door! Open the door!" He then turns to the audience and sez "You notice I didn't say 'Richard'?"

A Google search found this page which reveals that it's an allusion to a song called "Open the Door, Richard".

UPDATE: The Looney Tunes 4-DVD set has this very cartoon with commentary. The commentary presumably would have explained the joke.
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Posted by Daniel Frank at 9:12 AM

A Wall Street Journal reviewer suggests that the fortune of The Producers is sagging due to it being the last gasp of Borscht Belt-style comedy (not that he thinks it's a bad thing).

And speaking of humor from the past, Sid Caesar has a new book about the days of his various variety shows.

UPDATE: Mark Evanier rebuts.
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Posted by Daniel Frank at 8:51 AM

An LA Times article (registration: cptspaulding/cptspaulding) on how a Georgian town is reacting to a new book about Leo Frank (no relation), the only Jew in America to get lynched.
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Posted by Daniel Frank at 10:42 PM

Part III of the Beanie Baby saga: The lady who bought the Beanies is offering them for sale. Auction here. Also the Florida Sun Sentinel tracked down our drunkensailor friend. They report "He's not divorced. Happily married, in fact. No affairs."

Were this a TV show, it would turn out that his wife was really having an affair. Perhaps with the person who bought the dolls.
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Posted by Daniel Frank at 9:01 AM

In today's Bleat, Lileks reviews Just Imagine, a science fiction movie from 1930 set in 1980 which seems worth watching for this intriguing joke during a "tell-the-guy-from-1930-about-the-future" scene:

Then Mr. 1930 asks where all the cars have gone. No one uses cars anymore, he’s told. Everyone has a plane. "Vut kind uff planes do you haf?" asks Mr. 1930. The boys list off all the hot models: the Finkelstine, the Rabovtiz, the Speigelmen, etc. In other words, all Jewish names.

"Ho boy," says Mr. 1930. "Somebody got even with Henry Ford."

If you don't get the joke, this book will explain it.
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Posted by Daniel Frank at 11:05 AM

An alternate viewpoint to Mark Evanier's anti-Halloween rant (Thanks to Jim Treacher).
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